I feel the seasons change, the leaves, the snow and sun

Tuesday, 10/11/16, 9:45am, 12:10pm

ARGH. ARGH ARGH ARGH.

I stupidly hurt my finger. I rammed it into an edge on the towel rack when I went to dry my hands, and the fingernail tore, badly. It's split diagonally down the center, about a 1/3 of the way down. Oh it's ugly. The pain has gotten better, with advil and time, but I'm still frustrated.

I am so tempted to add a picture here, although it's covered with a band-aid now and I don't know that my readers would appreciate the gore. Hah.

Even though typing is probably not the best thing for the nail, I'm attempting it. Because I feel behind on the blog and I miss it.

This weekend... was... great. I ended up having a girls weekend in the mountains. These were women I've been friends with for a long time. All of us are moms, we all have kids of similar ages, some of the group met in birthing classes or around then, and two of us are sisters.

5 of the 6 of us carpooled up in, none other than, a minivan.

Half the group joined some of my family (my brother-in-law plus kids, my brother plus kid, 2 of my cousins) on a 14er on Saturday. (For those outside of Colorado, a 14er is a mountain that is 14,000ft or higher).

It was fun, tiring, humbling, and tough. I did not summit (I was having a really hard time with the elevation and shortness of breath which made me feel panicked, and I was starting to have trouble keeping a sure footing on the loose rocks), although we think I made it above 14,000ft elevation, probably within about 100ft of the summit, so I call it a win. :) We had some amazing views, and got really close to some mountain goats who had no fear around us.

me at my highest elevation of the day, admitting defeat 

Someday I will attempt it again, maybe after I get into better overall shape and better altitude shape. Need to be in more of a regular habit of going up to altitude before I attempt this one again.

Before the 14er group of the ladies weekend passed out of exhaustion Saturday night, we made it through a delicious dinner out, some apple pie sangria back at the condo,

we rocked out to some dance music with our awesome speaker setup,

and we played a fun game all together.

I feel like I keep getting breaks from the kids, breaks from regular life, lately, and yet I just seem to keep needing them. I guess that's life in some respects, or maybe life for me right now. While I continue to figure out living with depression, and anxiety. Maybe someday I'll have it more figured out, but right now, I feel like I have a long way to go.

Although I made it through the weekend feeling wonderful, the depression and anxiety hit yesterday when I was faced with the reality of Nasser leaving for a work trip for several days. I'm working on it, struggling but trying to allow myself the break now that I hurt my finger. Normal activity seems to be re-injuring it a little and I'm nervous to drive later tonight for choir. Still don't think I'll end up at urgent care for this, but we'll see.

I am done typing for today though. :-(